I'm... so not ready to grow up.

This time when I went home, I just felt so homesick before I even left. Just the thought of knowing that I'm leaving in a few days, makes me feel like I've only just been home for a few days. I just want to go back to being my parent's kid again.

They were super parents.. so much that I feel like after my sister and I moved out, they had a lot more time than they thought on their hands. I'm thankful to have such great parents that seriously just made the center of their worlds, my sister and I. I'm thankful they were so dedicated to us. I was ungrateful when I was growing up. I was so pissed and resentful that they only bought us JUST enough to get through the week. New shoes only when shoes hit waffle. But my parents literally bought us anything we needed for school and all the books and outside educational material we needed.. and my mom took my sister and I to the library every weekend and to Michael's for all the art projects we wanted to do when we were little. My sister and I have lived out so many ideas we talked to my mom about that we wanted to do. My dad wasn't always the best at knowing how to support us, but he's always handing us more than we needed. $60 dollars for a 16 year old to go out for lunch with her friends, $400 dollars to make sure I'm doing okay even though my mom pays off the credit card she gave me to put all my purchases on. Every weekend, my parents always took us somewhere.. and even though it was their trip, they rushed home on Sundays by 8pm so that my sister and I could watch the new Simpsons episode. We were selfish, and they were considerate of their bratty daughters. I remember the year my dad bought a state parks pass and we visited almost all the NorCal state parks that year. It's just kind of weird and sad to know that my sister and I will never "live" at home again.

Right now, half of me is still a kid, and the other half.. not quite an adult but growing into one. Half of me wants to go back to living at home, another half doesn't quite necessarily want too, but knows that I need to "grow up."

I don't know. Post-moving out blues.

I love my parents, dude.
My sister and I got so lucky.